“I see a lot of the things you post. There is always a negative “poor me” spin on it.”
This is just one example of something I get privately a lot.
I resent having my pain trivialized simply because I may have less of it than you. Also of course the suffering of males is completely socially irrelevant. I am expected to “man up” and pretend that suffering is something only weaker other males experience.
Many with objectively worse luck than me resent me for experiencing pain from a position of lesser pain than theirs. How dare I experience suffering without having cause equal to theirs?
Impact bias and hope forces all who suffer to project on anyone who suffers less than they as living a life in the constant state of joy we ourselves would (wrongly) expect to experience if suddenly elevated to that state.
The reality is far more terrifying and far less satisfying as should be obvious from the evidence, yet the brain ignores evidence, hence the many cognitive fallacies to which we are susceptible.
“What are you looking for? A giggling glitter girl or a woman you is going to challenge your reality and hold you accountable for your own happiness?”
Being “accountable” for “happiness” is just concept which allows you to blame the victim and dismiss the suffering of others.
Older women often resent young healthy (sexy) women for being desired more than they, despite the strong belief that they are superior and that beauty cannot possibly come with intelligence or wisdom. They look back on their “mistakes” (by which they so often mean failure to parley temporary beauty into more lucrative contracts) and they assume that all young women are stupid for not sharing their bitter mercenary outlook.
They also often choose to scold men for their desire, as if wanting a young and fit mate is both a choice, and a sleazy personal flaw. As if a more healthy and righteous choice would be to sexually desire decay and age.
This is a defeatist attitude. Aging itself is the enemy, not those who select against it.
Monogamy forces women to be sex objects and men to be walking tax returns for the purposes of attracting a mate because it always makes sense to sort by the rarest traits first when sifting a large set for a single best choice.
The fact is that minds are somewhat software. As a successful monogamous male it simply makes sense to sort the potential mate pool, since you know each will force you to disclaim all others on par with enforced monogamy, by youth and sex appeal.
The crass fact of the matter was best summed up by the following quote:
“You can teach them to type, but you can’t teach them to grow tits.” ~Charlie Wilson’s War
It’s amusing because some of these women also often point out that over time they learned to become these internally superior creatures. But if that’s true, if I know that sexy little (apparently stupid) things turn into deep, wise, (and sexually unappealing yet somehow superior and more fulfilling) things with time then why would I skip that phase? Put simply, if life is going to teach you to type anyway, why not demand tits up front? (Pun intended.)
The problem is that while money piles up, if you ever had it, beauty (for now) always fades. The snide comment above, who’s source I am obviously not revealing, betrays a common false dichotomy. I see in it raging envy. Which I understand and which I recognize as a choice, and as a wound.
Granted, rarely does youth come with genius and wisdom, but life, as we should have noticed by now, is not fair. (Karma is a myth, and there is no god. That people still believe is a testament to our ability to ignore evidence.) The fact is that some very few people, are genetic lottery winners. As well as being physically astonishing they are equally mentally amazing.
There are people better than you by your own standards. (David Pierce is a better human than me, point blank.) And people who have better luck than you suffer also because the entire game is rigged. This is why hate and vengeance are futile. The solution is to change the system, and aid the life and joy of ALL humans without exception. (Trolly problems and quarantine exceptions of course not withstanding, so long as death and pain are lords of life, sometimes, far more rarely than we pretend, death and pain must be deployed to serve life and joy.)
This is why I don’t hunt billionares for sport/fun despite the harm they do merely existing. As a primate, I obviously want to. Bashing a predator with a rock is genetically satisfying. But as an intelligent primate, I know not to use a rock, and I know that even if I did, that wouldn’t solve the actual problem.
(Specifically and immediately, the solution is an exponential progressive tax funding a UBI. http://underlore.com/one-possible-solution/)
The solution is not to scold and try to force those whom you resent to live in guilt and reverence, that will never happen and it is beyond them, at best you could force them to fake it while you are around.
The general solution is to attack suffering and death at the root until what remains is tolerable to all.
Pain and death are not invincible.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Congenital_insensitivity_to_pain
http://www.hedweb.com/transhumanism/neojainism.html
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Strategies_for_Engineered_Negligible_Senescence
“They could be shown the mastery of their minds and bodies, so that they could achieve the full expression of their powers, not spend their lives like ineffectual ghosts trapped in a marvelous machine beyond their skill to operate. They could break the domination of pain, so that it became a sentinel and not a tyrant, sending messages which the rational mind could accept or ignore as it pleased. Above all, they could choose to die only when they wished; they would be shown the many paths that led beyond the grave, and the price that must be paid for immortality in all its forms. A vista of infinite time would open up before them, with all its terror and promise. Some minds could face this, some could not; here was the dividing line between those who would inherit the universe, and those who were only quick-witted animals.” ~Arthur C Clarke (Via character.)